There are a few things in the life of a woman that take you back and make you realize that YOUR youth is not only slipping away but, in fact, had LONG since escaped your grasp! You can fool yourself while shopping with your youthful children that you are one of them... People always thinking that you are just an older sister or older friend who has found a kinship with some girls younger than herself. Sitting in the kindergarten classroom you could look around and think to yourself, "I do not look THAT old. Boy are my kids lucky to have such youthful parents!" As you walk the halls of the high school you think, surely the other kids are wondering why such a young looking person is checking out that youth from school... Must be a slightly older sister or an aunt surely thay could not be the parent.
As your children grow you remember the details of thier lives with startling clarity. The first time you ever laid eyes on them, Heck you remember the first time they ever moved in the womb! The outfit that you brought them to come home from the hospital, The first little cute poopey, The first time they sit and crawled, The first steps, The first words, Your whole life now becomes changed as you spend it cataloging every first. It is truely amazing that you forget the long night they spent crying, The hard times just seemed more bearable because they were there. Time passes in strange quick bursts. One day you think that you will never graduate high school and then have a child that you for sure just gave birth to graduating from high school. However you can still fool yourself into thinking that you are young because you have other kids that are still young so therefore, you have not really gotten that old.
Then "IT" happened.... The "THING" that I could not shelter myself from any longer. My sense of reality, my unfaltering reality, shattered... time HAD in fact been passing and Quickly. The bubble that I had been shielding myself with, from that painful reality, was burst into a million tiny peices. Yes in deed, I have been getting older everyday just like my kids! The phrase that would send me into a spiraling time zone letting me know that I was in fact not just older BUT OLD!!!!
It was those two nasty little words that would change my life forever and ever, for time and all eternity... I DO!!!
And in saying those two nasty little words, over an alter, my youthful daughter took me from the safety zone I was living in to a new realm.
Last week was one of THOSE realizations for me as I went from young mother of many to.... MOTHER~IN~LAW!!!
No doubt sooner than I would want or imagine she will again through me into a cataclizmic reality and a completely differnt realm when she annoucnes that I will no longer be just a mom or mother~in~law but also a GRANDMA!!!
THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO BLAHHHHHHHH!